Dear Bully: Seventy Authors Tell Their Stories Paperback – September 6, 2011

Were you the bully? The victim? Or somewhere in between? Maybe you were more than one through your childhood. Whatever mold you fit into, I am sure you have been a part of bullying from one angle or another throughout your life. As a teacher or parent, you have probably had to witness it. You have tried to stop it, but felt powerless in the face of the beast that has consumed childhoods and ended some. Sure, you can stop what you see in front of you, but the bullying is everywhere, like an omniscient, suffocating monster that is impervious to your efforts. That is why Dear Bully was published.Dear Bully is a compilation of short essays from 70 authors. These are authors our children have read, and maybe we have read as well. These are adults who write for our children every day, so who better to talk to them about bullying? The stories these adults shared were ones of anger, of survival, and of shame. Some were the victims, the bystanders, or the bullies themselves. This is an amazing compilation of stories that dissect the bullying phenomenon from the inside out. But most importantly, they speak to kids today.The stories aren't written for parents or teachers. They are written directly for the children surviving in the terrifying jungle that high school has become. Some are stories of triumph while others show pure survival. Either way, bullying is serious, it can kill you, but you don't have to give in to it. Some are funny, some are terrifying. R.L. Stine's story of how coincidence combined with his wise-guy big mouth got him bullied reminded me of why I loved his books as a young adult. He added humor to his story and showed how quick wit can get you into trouble and out of it with quite a flair!The most touching stories for me were those of the bystanders, the kids who did nothing to stop the bullying or went along with it for fear of being the next target. In my senior literature class this term we have been talking at length about a three character play called Death and the Maiden where the characters represent the victim, the perpetrator, and the bystander. Victims and perpetrators are fairly straight forward, but the bystander is a fuzzy gray area. Sometimes they are guilty, sometimes they are innocent, but one thing follows them and even haunts them- the failure to do anything to stop the hurt of the victim. This is a group my kids and I struggled to define because they are so different. One thing they have in common, though, is that shame of not trying to stop it.When we are young, we barely know who we are yet. Who are we kidding, I am 30 and I barely know! So how do we empower kids to stand up, stop the bullying, and free themselves from the shame of being a bystander? How do we let kids know that there are people out there to talk to, people who can save them? This book is a huge start. I loved the fact that the stories ranged across the bullying spectrum, but my one criticism is that the stories are predominantly from the female perspective. There are a few male authors, but mostly women contributed their stories. i wish it was more even across genders, but I still love what this book contains. It holds hope. Page after page, from cover to cover, you see hope. This is a message we can't prevent our children from hearing.The stories themselves are very short- the longest is about 5 pages long. This is great for a student who has a short attention span or struggles with comprehension in a full-length novel. The short snippets are independent and can therefore be used as excellent comprehension checks by themselves without a need to remember everything that came before it. The wide mix of stories is also great to reach many different kinds of children. And if they aren't into a particular story? Skip it! This is an amazing book that should have a home in every classroom, library or home with children. Spread the message:"Dear Bully, You think you can beat me. But I disagree. Sincerely, Not a Victim"

Finally got my copy of Dear Bully. I dont agree with rate this book because you cant judge other's experiences or stories. I did give it a 5 so other's will take a look at this book. There is a lot of emotion in this read. I wish everyone who has been bullied or who is a bully to read this book.This book is POWERFUL!!!!! Everyone has dealt with a bully sometime in there life. I encourage you all to write your own Dear Bully letter........Here's mineDear Bully,I use to love swimming, I remember spending all my summer at the pool with my best friend. I was only trying to "be cool", like you. Join in on your conversation, maybe make a new friend. You kept me underwater for what seemed like hours. By the time you let go of me, my lungs were burning from the lack of air, the water, and just fear. I never told anyone, not even to this day. You took a joy away from me, but you did give me something in return. You put such a deep fear of drowning in me that when I had kids, swimming was one of the first things to learn. My husband taught each one to swim. Not just for fun, but for survival. So thank you, thank you that my kids know what to do if they are ever in a situation where they are held underwater. They know how to save someone else's life. They know the importance of swimming safety. Maybe one day I'll even try to go back into the water, who knows.Your not to funny joke,Me

I read this book for research purposes and felt really disheartened at just how pervasive bullying is, but it's even worse now that cyberbullying is a real problem for many kids. It brought back memories of my own experiences at school and reinforced just how damaging these experiences are. You do carry the scars for the rest of your life, but the book's ultimate message is that it's possible to move past these things and recognise the bullies for what they are: weak, insecure people who can only feel good about themselves by bringing others down. Victims of bullying and those who stand by and allow it to happen out of fear give far too much power to the aggressors.I think this book will be beneficial to young people experiencing bullying because it will help them to see that bullies are made from the same mould and they can only steal your self-worth if you let them. By recognising bullies for what they truly are they lose their power to hurt. Society as a whole needs to condemn bullying by refusing to look away and by turning the ridicule and humiliation back onto the perpetrators. They will quickly learn that bullying does not pay. School should be a nurturing place where young people feel empowered to take risks and explore different identities, not a place where strict conformity rules and anyone who dares to step out of line or be different is slammed to the ground. It really does say a lot about society that this is the training ground for adulthood, and it's just sad that so many kids have terrible memories of their school years. In this celebrity obsessed culture where looks and designer labels are valued above all else I don't hold out much hope that things will change any time soon, but this is a very good book which explores the issue from all sides. It would be an excellent resource for teachers to use in class.

I started this book not over a few hours ago and am already done. This book was so gripping that I couldn't put it down. This book made me realize that bullying is all too real and is something that has to be stopped.This book had stories about being bullied, but also about being the bully. I have this book five stars because it really made me realize how scarring bullying can be. I would recommend this book to parents, teachers, students, those bullied and those bullying. This is a great read for young adults who are experiencing these things, and I highly recommend this to all.

I usually review my books in the order in which I read them, but I decided to deviate from that rule because you have to write some reviews while you have the words to say what you want to say, otherwise you risk never finding those words again. This is one of those reviews.Dear Bully compiles some of the most heart-wrenching, moving, inspiring, horrifying and heartbreaking tales of bullying that I have ever read about. Whether the contributing author was the Bully, victim or bystander they are all truly memorable.I'm not ashamed to say that some of the authors stories made me shed a few tears and as someone who has suffered bullying as a child to some extent, I could relate to some of the feelings these authors have expressed during their retelling's of their own bullying experiences.What I think is so alarming, and this is something I wish teachers in schools and parents would take note of, is that these authors all remember there experiences of bullying so clearly. This should immediately send alarm bells ringing in people's heads as clearly these experiences are not 'just part of growing up' and clearly leave some form of emotional scaring on the individuals involved as well as awful memories. I think the message is clear, bullying should not be tolerated, it is not something to endure and it should be stopped, no child (or adult even) should have to go through these experiences.On the brighter side of things, a lot of these experiences have been channelled into positive things such as ideas for books, the strength to move on or even to become a stronger individual but the fact still remains, no one should ever have to endure victimisation in order to become something more in life. Not all stories have a positive outcome and there are some sobering facts about bullying and suicide that will make you think twice about your views.Whether written in the form of essay, poem or short story these are a collection of stories that everyone should read, whether you've been bullied or not, whether you've witnessed it or not or even if you were a bully yourself. This is a book that will give you an insight into the minds of victims and bully's alike.